Home Meet Adrienne Blog Get on the waitlist Login

Sorry not sorry.

life mindset Feb 22, 2019

Why do you apologize all the time?”  My husband asked me this when I apologized the other day.

Hmmm….I wondered and started paying attention.

Yep.  He was right.  I do over-apologize.

The other day I was at the grocery store.  When the cashier began to ring up the bulk items I had selected, she noticed the labels didn’t have bar codes on them.  While I took the time to weigh and label each item, the bar code didn’t print and she couldn’t ring them up.

Immediately, I felt like I should apologize.  And, I almost did.  I had to force myself not to.  Isn’t that crazy?

"Saying sorry too much is a common problem (especially among women). However, over apologizing all the time could mean you’re essentially saying sorry for your existence. Over time this not only undermines your self-worth but also your capacity to manifest an abundant life." - Katherine Hurst

As I was in line waiting for another store employee to go look up the codes I found myself needing to resist the need to apologize.  I kept thinking, “Don’t apologize, don’t you dare apologize.  You don’t need to own this.”

As we were waiting for the young man to return, I looked back at the line that was starting to get longer and longer.  Once again, I felt like I needed to apologize.  I felt like I was responsible for it taking longer to ring up my purchases.

Many women do this too, I noticed.  We often apologize unnecessarily.

Do you apologize too much, too?  Do you apologize for things that you shouldn’t or needn’t ?

Don’t misunderstand me, apologizing is a good thing when it’s warranted.

However, I think girls are often raised to be nice, to share, to not make trouble, to be polite and to think of others.  While these are good qualities to have, I believe there needs to be a balance and we need a better narrative for girls (ourselves included.)

Next time you find yourself needing to apologize, I encourage you to be curious. Is it really necessary?  Or is it a fall back.

Sorry not sorry is sexy.

PS:  I’d love to hear from you.  Have you noticed the you apologize too much?  If so, have you found it uncomfortable to stop or try not to?

PPS: I did it again!  Before finishing this post, I apologized to a company for making a mistake on my order.  Ugh!  I felt bad because they had to redo their work.  So I apologized!  Instead of saying, “I’m sorry you have to redo your work.”, I should have said.  “Thank you for making it right.”  See the difference there?


Stay connected!  

Join my email list.

Receive tips, tricks and strategies for loving your body, your relationships and your life.  You'll also get access to exclusive subscriber-only offers.

Your information is kept private and you can unsubscribe at any time. ;)


50% Complete

Coming Soon!

Get Your Sexy Back - The Online Course

Get on the waitlist!